Celebrate Good Times

It’s official! We’re breaking ground on the theatre renovation next week. Important members of the community and neighborhood will be there to commemorate it and welcome us. I’m pretty excited. Our next board meeting won’t be for awhile but Zeke said that Nick is going to basically pitch all sort of PR and marketing ideas to get the theatre’s name out there and build up hype. But more importantly it’s supposed to attract a lot of investors. Hopefully Nick is as good as I’ve heard.

Molly and I wanted to go out and celebrate. So we invited all the girls.

Weightless

It was foggy when Molly and I loaded into her car. I had my pajamas on and felt nervous as we drove toward the clinic. It was about 30 minutes away and when we arrived, we saw the protesters. They had graphic signs and I could hear their muffled screaming through the car windows. I closed my eyes until I felt the car come to a complete stop.

“Ready?” Molly asked looking over at me.

I took a deep breath and nodded before I got out of the car. It was time.

Prepped and Ready

I went to my first appointment on Wednesday and had to listen to a nurse explain what my options were and assure her I wasn’t being forced into anything. I also had to get an ultrasound to verify that I was still pregnant and to determine what kind of abortion I was eligible.

Mind Made

Brad wanted me to come over so we could talk some more about the pregnancy now that time had passed for us to both think about it. My first referral appointment is on Wednesday and I had already decided that I wasn’t going to tell Brad until a few days after my final appointment on Saturday. I just didn’t want him to make it more difficult than it was already going to be. I didn’t really want to talk to Brad about the pregnancy but decided to hear what he had to say, anyway, since we both had time to think about things. I knew there was an almost impossible chance I’d change my mind no matter what he said but when I eventually tell him about the abortion, I want him to at least feel like he got to have his thoughts taken into consideration before it happened.

Waiting

I sat in the doctor’s office twitching my foot nervously. I had just peed in a cup to confirm that I was pregnant, which a nurse took. Molly and I were left in the exam room to wait. It seemed like an eternity had passed when the doctor finally walked in.

She had light brown hair and thick, black glasses that matched her sensible black pumps. She was wearing a wrap dress in a calming blue color.

“Hi, Faith. I’m Dr. Green.”

Choices

I have my doctor’s appointment tomorrow. And I told Molly a few days ago.

Surprise,Surprise

I’m absolutely exhausted so this is going to be fairly short. When I got back to the hospital after a quick nap and change of clothes, Anna still hadn’t progressed very far in her labor. Zoey had gone home for a nap and a change of clothes as well and she came back about 15 minutes after me.

To be honest it was all really boring. Zoey and I waited in the lounge because there was a limit on how many people were allowed in Anna’s room and her family had flown in the minute they heard and were camped out in her room with Theo. Theo would come in occasionally to update us and drink some coffee. We ran across the street to a diner to get everyone dinner at one point. Zoey and I ate there so we could get out of the sanitizing lights of the hospital. We both had bags under our eyes.

“She has been in labor for 36 hours. You’d think SOMETHING would have happened by now.” Zoey whined.

I agreed. Having a baby is certainly boring (when you aren’t the one having the baby, I would assume). After 8 more hours Anna FINALLY started to progress with some pitocin to aid her. Theo came running into the room within 15 minutes of him telling us she was at 10 centimeters to announce the birth.

“It’s a boy!”

Zoey and I hugged Theo and gave many congratulations.

“Anna is experiencing a problem, though, her placenta won’t drop. I’ll keep you guys updated.” Theo ran out of the room before we could freak out.

“That’s not a big deal, right, Faith?” Zoey turned to me.

We were both pretty pale.

“I…I don’t know.”

Suddenly Theo came back and nearly wiped out trying to throw himself through the doorway to the lounge.

“Is she okay!?” Zoey and I asked at the same time.

Theo’s face was in shock. He was sweating and his eyes were wide.

“She...we…there was another baby in there!” He sputtered.

“WHAT?” Zoey looked dumbfounded.

“We have a girl! And a boy!”

“How does that even happen?” I asked, equally dumbfounded.

“The second baby was really high up, they mistook her for the placenta, the heart beat was never found because the…twins, “Theo sounded shocked that he could even say the word, “I guess their heartbeats were totally in sync.”

Theo looked like he was going to pass out.

“Theo?” Zoey said moving him to a couch covered in plastic, “Is this common?”

“It happens, but ultrasounds usually catch it. Oh my God we have to buy another car seat! And more diapers! And a double wide stroller! And-”

“We’ll go get you a car seat, Theo, you should probably go back in there.” I said, “But, first, how is Anna?”

“Are you kidding? She’s ECSTATIC!”

I’ll write more soon, but I’m falling asleep at my laptop and need to go to bed!

(Author's Note: Hi new readers! I hope you enjoy the blog, I welcome criticism in the comments as long as it's respectful. Thanks to the lovely people who recommended me!)

Double Whamy

I was invited to go out for drinks with a few work friends after we were all done for the day and I decided to go because I had so much fun the last time and because Dina and Suzy were going to be there and we haven’t had much time to catch up since the holidays (they’ve both been really busy with deadlines what with the revolutions going on in the Middle East and Africa [for Dina] and Charlie Sheen [for Suzy] and the hot mess he’s become). I had a few paperwork things to finish with Steve so we got there about an hour late but the party was in full swing!

Dina and Suzy were dancing with some other work friends to old 80’s music pumping out of the jukebox and waved at me as Steve and I sat down with our group. Riley, one of the politics writers was sitting next to Stormy, who I sat down next to. Steve sat across from me next to Tom. Suzy is adamant that they are dating but for a gossip writer she seems to be wrong a lot with the office gossip, so I’m taking it with a grain of salt but still suspicious. I’m positive that Steve would have told me by now if they were, after all, he helped me write the policy guidelines requiring all employees to make their relationships known.

A few people were buzzed and bordering on tipsy by the time Steve and I got there. I knew Dina definitely was because she normally doesn’t let loose like she was on the dance floor. She came over to me out of breath and tossed her arms around me.

“Faaaaaaiiiith!!!! I’ve missed yooou! I feel like we never talk anymore!”

“I miss you, too Dina, we should get lunch regularly again. Is your husband going to come pick you up?”

“Yeeess! We need shots!” She twirled around her chair and dragged Suzy off the dance floor and to the bar to go get more shots. I was laughing as I watched them. It was nice to see them having so much fun, especially with how hard they’ve been working, lately. I settled into a martini and relaxed. I’d had a long day and was enjoying listening to the various conversations between my co-workers when I noticed Stormy doing the same thing.

“How are you, Stormy?” I asked leaning forward so he could hear me over the jukebox.

“I’m doing okay. I was wondering if I could talk to you about something. Can we go outside?”

“Sure.” I said downing my martini, grabbing my purse, and standing up.

When we were outside it became pretty apparent just how loud the music was inside, my ear were ringing in the sudden quiet. It had become dark outside and I realized just how hungry I was.

“Um, this is sort of awkward…but do you want to grab a slice of pizza across the street?”

I stared at Stormy with confusion.

“I thought we talked about this, Stormy, I’m in a-”

“It’s not a date.” He said trying to reassure me, “It just might be a long conversation.”

I shrugged and followed him across the street to a pizza place. We paid for our slices and sat at a table before he started.

“I need your advice.”

“Okay…” I said taking a bite.

“I don’t want to be a news anchor anymore. I want to be a journalist full-time for the paper.”

“Oh.” I was pretty shocked.

Stormy has definitely gone through a personality change since working at the paper. He was really cocky and full of himself, not to mention a womanizer and generally a creep. But I think he’s become more professional since we’ve worked together and he’s been taking his writing more seriously as of late. At the same time, this is a problem. Veronica has mentioned in the past what an asset he is to the nightly news as an anchor and I KNOW she is going to flip when he tells her.

“Writing again has really made me realized why I got into this field and I don’t want to be a newscaster anymore. I want to write. I want to be a journalist again. I know Veronica is going to be majorly pissed so I was wondering if you had any ideas on how to approach her.”

“Well, Rose her secretary would probably be the best person to ask. I would recommend, though, that you make an appointment with Veronica because she’s so busy. She also probably won’t appreciate you just sticking your head into her office and dropping this huge bomb on her, especially since ratings have been…taxing lately.”

The nightly news Sean and Veronica were working on (and the sponsor of our paper) wasn’t doing as well in the ratings department. Veronica said that it’s because there was too much coverage over celebrities and that we should do more serious stories but her bosses aren’t buying it and are reluctant to listen to her suggestions. It’s made Veronica very stressed out and Stormy’s decision really couldn’t be coming at a worse time for her.

“But you really should contact Rose about how to talk to Veronica.” I said.

Stormy looked crestfallen. I think he’d wanted to avoid that because he and Rose had a relationship that ended very, very badly, from what I’ve heard.

“I’m sorry I can’t be of more help.” I said.

“It’s okay. At least I tried.” He shrugged.

Just then my phone buzzed. I looked down and I had a text from Theo:

Thundercats are Go! Anna is in labor, we’ll be at the hospital in 20 minutes!

I told Stormy I had to go and then hailed a cab. I was at the hospital for about 8 hours. I’ve just popped in to take a nap and change my clothes. I’ll finish telling you all what happens when Anna finally has her baby! (It’s looking like a LOOOOOOONG labor, kids!)

Good Golly Miss Molly!

Anna’s baby shower was today and I just got back to my apartment. Anna is absolutely ginormous and so adorable in her maternity clothes. Pregnancy looks really good on her and I’m so happy that things are so different compared to last year. Sean was going to meet me there because he was picking up some beers for Theo’s basement party so Molly and I arrived together. Zoey had been there for an hour already, helping Anna set up and greet guests. We got there sort of late because Molly dropped the diaper cake and the top tier came loose. We probably looked ridiculous running down the street trying to pick up the diapers that had burst out of the tier but we got it put back together and made it to the party about 10 minutes late.

As soon as I walked in, I froze. Elise was standing next to a few of Anna’s work friends laughing. I felt blindsided, to be honest. I know Anna tried to avoid having a falling out with Elise but it never really crossed my mind that Elise would be at her baby shower. In hindsight, I probably should have expected it and I should have prepared myself for it. Molly looked at me and the shocked expression on my face before rushing me over to the gift table to drop off our diaper cake.

“What’s going on?” She asked pretending to straighten some of the gifts.

“I didn’t expect Elise to be here.” I whispered back following her lead.

Just then Anna came out and gave both of us hugs (which was difficult considering how large her baby belly is) and invited us to grab some pizza from the kitchen. Molly and I walked into the kitchen as Anna went to join in the conversation with her work friends.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one that wasn’t expecting her to be here.” Zoey said sipping a glass of lemonade and leaning on a kitchen counter.

“Is it that obvious?” I asked pouring Molly and me some lemonade and grabbing a slice of pizza.

“Don’t worry; the shock will wear off soon.” Zoey smirked.

“I take it you guys don’t like Elise?” Molly asked.

“Well, since she arrived, she’s told Anna that pizza was a stupid thing to have at a baby shower and complained because there weren’t any cocktails. She then asked Theo for some of the beer that Sean brought over and then asked Anna why she had a cake instead of a fruit plate because the calories in cake aren’t going to help Anna lose weight. THEN she accused me of purposefully omitting her from the gift everyone at work pitched in on but I have an e-mail from her saying she would buy Anna her own gift. She bought Anna a box of condoms.”

Molly and I were silent after Zoey finished. A beat went by before the three of us burst into laughter at the absolute absurdity of Elise’s behavior.

“That’s really rude.” Molly said when we all calmed down from laughing, “Does she not realize that Anna has a baby in her? Or does she think Anna has just gotten fat?”

“I don’t even know,” Zoey said, “but Elise has always had a fixation on weight and physical appearance.” Zoey’s expression was dark and I knew she was referring to her surprise birthday party a few months ago where Elise insulted Zoey’s weight while simultaneously trying to steal Wesley.

“Is Anna okay?” I asked.

“Um, I think she’s trying to ignore Elise’s comments by convincing herself that Elise is just joking sarcastically, but it’s pretty obvious that Elise is just being rude. To be entirely honest, I’m surprised Anna hasn’t started crying yet.”

Just then, Elise walked into the kitchen.

“Careful with that pizza Faith, you don’t want to get fat.”

Elise stopped at the kitchen island and grabbed another slice when Molly caught her eye.

She stopped and smiled before saying, “I see some of us are a little too far gone for help, though.”

Zoey and I expected Molly to be hurt but she didn’t miss a beat.

“You must be Elise,” she smiled, “I’ve heard a lot about you, apparently you’re not only rude, but you’re also a raging bitch. And I have some news for you, homeskillet, a plastic surgeon can make me look thinner or prettier or whatever else you’ve decided to internally hate about yourself and lash out by critiquing other women for but a plastic surgeon will never be able to fix your absolutely disgusting personality.”

And with that Molly grabbed two more slices from the island, put them on her plate, and walked out while Zoey and I stood there to take in the shocked and horrified look on Elise’s face.

“What are you looking at?” Elise snapped at us.

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.” I said.

Zoey and I left the kitchen to join Anna and her work friends. We played a few games and cut the cake until Anna sent me downstairs to get Theo do they could open the gifts together.

“Hey guys.” I said coming down the stairs.

Theo had a few friends from the hospital along with Sean crowded around a big screen television. It was halftime and they were chatting about the game so far.

“Hey, I sent you a text to warn you about Elise,” Sean said coming up to me to give me a kiss and whisper in my ear, “but I wasn’t sure if you got it.”

“I didn’t, but it’s okay, you missed Molly totally ripping Elise a new one.” I whispered back.

“Is it time for presents?” Theo asked.

“Yeah, Anna sent me down here, she said it’s fine if Theo just comes upstairs since the game is on but the cake is pretty good, gentlemen, so you might want to consider coming upstairs for a piece.”

We all trooped up the stairs and Anna and Theo started opening gifts. Anna received a breast pump, so many baby clothes, the diaper cake Molly and I brought, a newborn bassinette, a baby lap pillow thing, her parents and in-laws went in on a deluxe baby stroller, and the final gift was the food package Zoey had gotten mutual work friends to go in on. Anna loved everything until Elise made Theo open her gift (the pack of condoms) and then made a suggestive joke about how she wanted to make sure Theo didn’t “knock up” any of his mistresses while Anna isn’t allowed to have sex after giving birth soon.

There was a really uncomfortable silence after that until Sean jumped in.

“Well, so we can still catch the last quarter of the game, guys!”

Theo’s work friends all quickly followed Sean downstairs to try and get off the sinking ship the party had become because of Elise but Theo stayed behind for a few minutes to thank everyone for the gifts. Zoey and I pulled Anna to the side to see how she was doing because her mood had dropped significantly.

“I just don’t understand why she’s being like this.” She said on the verge of tears.

“Probably because she can’t stand that you’re the center of attention.” I said.

“Or because she’s just a really mean person and a bad friend.” Zoey said.

It was harsh, but true. I was trying to be more sensitive but I knew Zoey wanted Anna to finally stop being in denial about Elise and her behavior. If I had been at the party as long as Zoey was and witnessed Elise’s treatment of Anna, I would have been impatient, too.

“But, she’s-” Anna’s face went from being sad, to shocked, to pissed in a matter of milliseconds before she pushed past us.

Zoey and I whipped around to see Anna angrily walking across the room to Elise who was flirtatiously hitting Theo’s chest. Molly came up behind us with a bowl of popcorn.

“This is going to be good, guys.” She said offering us the bowl. Zoey and I both took a handful and started munching on it, prepared to watch.

“That’s IT!” Anna hissed. “You need to leave.”

“Excuse me?” Elise said.

“I want to you to go; you’re ruining my baby shower.”

“Oh, please Anna.” Elise turned back to Theo, giggling.

“I’m serious. I want you to leave and I never want to hear from you again.”

“Anna, what is wrong with you? You’re acting crazy! Is it because of your hormones?”

“NO! It’s because YOU are a…you are a BAD friend and I’m sick and tired of you being mean to me all the time. At first I thought it was because you were feeling left out and not included in our group of friends, but now I realize that you’re actually just a really mean person and I want you to go. Now!”

Elise looked around at the party guests, who were all trying to hide their smiles, as if she expected someone to stand up for her but no one did. I looked over and could see Sean and Theo’s friends’ heads poking over the basement stairs with wide eyes. Elise looked at Zoey and me and narrowed her gaze when she realized we were happily eating popcorn and watching Anna yell at her.

“This is all your fault!” Elise said pointing at the two of us before storming out of Anna and Theo’s house and slamming the door so a picture frame fell off the wall.

Anna watched her go before turning around to the guests and apologizing for yelling. Then we all just moved on after that. It was really nice. Theo and the guys went downstairs (Sean flashed me a thumbs up and mouthed the word “wow” as he followed Theo down the stairs) to finish watching the game and the rest of us played some more games. Before the end of the party, Anna, Zoey, Molly, and I scheduled a last girl’s night before Anna gives birth and I think it will be really great. Elise is no longer a subject of tension between Zoey, Anna, and I and I can’t help but feel like a lot of weight has been lifted from our relationship

What I like about you

I had been thinking about what Sean had said about Elise at my spontaneous sleep over and decided to call her to try and make plans with her for next week but she didn’t answer her phone. I tried calling three different times throughout the day and eventually just ended up leaving a message saying that I’ve missed her and would like to go to lunch to catch up sometime. Maybe I’m just being paranoid, but I have the feeling that Anna isn’t the only person Elise is refusing to talk to.

I put the thought out of my head as I got ready for my double date with Anna and Theo. Sean was going to pick me up at my apartment and, to be honest, I think I was looking forward to just being with him again more than I was our double date. That’s weird, right? I mean I just saw Sean; I should not be on the verge of extreme happiness at being able to see him a little over 24 hours later.

Anyway, I skimmed my closet and settled on a black and cobalt blue cocktail dress and some black sandal platform pumps. The dress’s blue straps crisscrossed in the back and the black skirt was lined with the same blue fabric. I put my hair up into a casual pony tail and spritzed on some apple-scented perfume as a final touch. I sent Sean a text telling him I was going to meet him outside. He hadn’t arrived yet but the weather was nice and I wanted to get out of my apartment. I said good-bye to Murphy before locking my door and walking down the stairs.

When Sean walked up I was a little surprised. He was dressed in a black buttonless blazer with a gray t-shirt underneath, dark jeans, and a pair of gray Chucks (this is Sean’s sense of formal and it totally works for him). I wasn’t surprised at how good he looked; I was surprised because he’d done his hair in a really weird way. It was too neat for Sean and honestly…it reminded me of Kevin. I wasn’t a fan and it made me really uncomfortable because all I could think about was Kevin and what had happened the last time I’d seen him.

“Hey,” He said giving me a kiss on the forehead and slipping his arm around my waist.

We started walking and, like a complete goon, I couldn’t stop smiling now that we were together.

“You’re in a good mood…did you talk to Elise?”

I stopped smiling and shook my head, “I couldn’t get a hold of her on the phone. I left a message, though, so hopefully she calls me soon.”

“Oh…”

I stopped walking and Sean turned to me, “Is something wrong?”

“Yeah, I just need to do this, it’s bothering me.” I pulled Sean by the lapels of his blazer for a deep kiss and then threw my arms over his shoulders. While he was distracted I made sure to ruffle up his hair and I started smiling at my cleverness.

“Do you really hate it that much?” Sean said without breaking the kiss.

“You have no idea.” I laughed.

We resumed walking again and eventually met up with Anna and Theo at an Americana type of restaurant. When I saw them I could not contain my excitement! Anna is starting to show! She’s nearly four months along and is the cutest pregnant lady I’ve ever seen. She had her hair blown out and was a wearing a very demure pink dress that showed her baby bump very nicely. Theo was absolutely beaming, he looked like he was glowing more than Anna was.

We settled in to dinner and I can honestly say that tonight was one of the best nights I’ve had in such a long time. Anna was sharing pregnancy stories with me while Theo and Sean talked about the band and travelling, somehow the conversation turned to dancing.

“Oh, we haven’t gone in a really long time! I’m really excited to go listen to music tonight; Theo promised he would dance with me.” Anna said nudging Theo a little. He blushed.

“You know I think the last time I went dancing was when I…” my eyes slid to Sean and suddenly I was the one blushing. Sean choked on the water he was drinking when he realized what I was talking about.

Sean met me the night Zoey, Anna, Elise, and I had gone out to get me out of my Kevin funk and I had danced to his band’s music before we hooked up in a bar bathroom. Before that…I had met Kevin during one of our dancing nights, too, although I had only made out with Kevin, then. Apparently, my dancing skills attract men easily.

“OH.” Anna said, realization spreading on her face. She looked from Sean to me and smiled sheepishly. Theo was the only one who didn’t know what we were talking about. He had a look of utter bewilderment on his face.

“Sean and I met the last time Anna and I were out dancing, Theo,” I reached across the table to pat his hands and laughed.

“That was quite an eventful night…” Sean trailed off; he rubbed the back of his head which ruffled his hair up even more.

After some more conversation over dinner, we lost track of time and Sean had to leave before we could get our check.

“Aw, geez,” Sean said looking down at the 5^th text message he got from Gerry in the past 15minutes, “I gotta go, guys, how about I’ll meet you when you get over there, my manager is going to have a stroke if I don’t leave right now.”

“That’s fine, you’re the big rock star, after all, we’ll see you there, Sean.” Anna said.

Sean gave me kiss and handed me a wad of money under the table before hurrying out of the restaurant. I put his money in my purse and paid with a credit card about thirty minutes later (Anna was eating for two, now and as such she had a lot of food to eat. Theo and I were all too willing to help her out, though because it was so delicious). Once we made it to the bar, I grabbed a table for us while Anna ran to the bathroom.

“Theo…I don’t really want to bring this up….but you’re not going to bring up that thing we talked about, right?”

“Never….can we actually pretend that that particular conversation never took place? Cause I would really like that….”

I nodded as he reached for the drink menu laying the table and Anna rejoined us. We gave Theo our drink orders (Anna and I got ginger ales and Theo got a beer) and while he was at the bar she gave me her run-down of what she thought of Sean.

“He’s really great Faith and I am digging this music, he said he writes it himself, right?”

“Yeah he does…”

“Did-did I say something wrong?” Anna asked searching my eyes.

“No…I just…he is great, Anna…I’m in love with him.”

“Why do you look so sad then?”

“It’s…complicated.” I said sighing at what a lame explanation that was.

“Well, you can expect a phone call from me soon drilling you about it since you’re being so vague wi- thanks sweetie!”

Theo slid into the booth with our drinks right at that moment and Anna covered well. We listened to Sean’s band play and then they finally had a break so he came over and sat next to me. I opened my purse and placed Sean’s money in his hand under the table.

He looked at me, confused, and I waved him off and whispered, “It’s not a big deal. Dinner was my treat.” He shoved the money back in his pocket and shrugged.

Just then I saw Jake and Eddie across the room and waved them over to say hi (Guy was outside talking to his girlfriend on the phone and Gerry was sulking in a corner looking at his iPhone and constantly checking his watch).

“Faith! And how are you on this fine evening?” Jake said leaning on our booth. Eddie came up behind him and stood next to Sean.

“Hello Jake and Eddie. How are the wedding plans going?” They smiled at each other and we shared a laugh. I realized that Anna and Theo didn’t know anyone from Sean’s band so I took the liberty to introduce them.

“Jake, Eddie, this is my friend Anna and her husband Theo, we just had dinner with together and I wanted to introduce them to your music.”

“Ah, so that’s where you were. No wonder Gerry’s pissed.” Jake said to Sean as he shook hands with Anna and Theo.

Jake and Eddie excused themselves to go see some friends hanging out at the bar. I opened my mouth to ask Sean, what exactly Jake meant about Gerry when a waiter came over with a beer.

“Ma’am, this was sent to you by the guy over there.” He pointed to a blonde guy in a green shirt leaning against the bar about 15 feet down from our table. The waiter slid the beer in my direction and I looked from the waiter, to the blonde guy, and then to Sean with a look of confusion on my face. I could see the gears tuning in Sean’s head as he looked at me and then at the guy standing near the bar. Sean raised his eyebrow at the smug look on the guy’s face, grabbed the beer, toasted him, and drank it. Anna and Theo were sharing an uncomfortable moment on their side of the table, so I decided to try and make a joke about what had just happened.

“What kind of loser does that?”

“Yeah…did he actually think that you would have…I mean…who actually thinks that works…” Anna said trying to help me out.

Sean put the bottle down, gave me a kiss, and left to go back on stage; his break was up. I was a little relieved when Sean left because the tension of the whole situation went with him. When the waiter came by I made it a point to make him take the beer away and made sure I shot a disgusted look at the guy who had had the audacity to send it over to me.

After awhile, a new band took over for the night and Sean rejoined our table.

“Do you want a water or something?” I asked him.

“No, I think I owe you a dance, though, right?”

“That means I’m going to have to keep my promise,” Theo said in mock annoyance.

Anna clapped and bounced in her seat as Theo started edging out of the booth. Sean held my hand as he went to slide out but I held him back while Anna and Theo made their way to the dance floor.

Sean sensed what I was doing and smiled at me, “I’m fine, let’s go dance, you’ve never seen my awesome dance moves before.” He was right, we spent most of the night we met talking in a booth, making out, and exploring the different uses of a bathroom’s wall and Sean’s hotel room.

I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it if Sean really was okay so I followed him and we started dancing. Sean is pretty nerdy when it comes to his dance moves but I’ve got to admit, I had a great time. He doesn’t take himself very seriously when he’s performing so it was nice to see that it also overflows into other areas where others might be watching him. Anna and Theo were having a great time too, from what I could tell and then everything stopped being fun.

“Could I dance with you?”

Sean had just twirled me around when I heard the guy who had sent me the drink earlier.

“Dude, can you not see she’s with someone?” Sean asked, extremely irritated, there was no remnant of happiness to be found on his face.

“I asked her, not you.” He looked at me, completely ignoring Sean, who was standing behind me, “He will let you speak for yourself, right?”

I glared at the guy who had basically just ruined my evening, “I want to dance with my boyfriend, not you. Stop bothering me.”

Anna and Theo had stopped dancing and had come to stand by Sean and assess the situation.

“We should go…it’s late…” Anna said grabbing my arm and trying to pull me through the door. Theo had already started to lead Sean out.

When we got outside we started walking towards the restaurant from earlier because that’s where Anna had parked. She offered to drive us to Sean’s apartment and we accepted. I didn’t really want to go back to his apartment, but it would have been rude and ridiculously out of Anna’s way to loop around and take me back to my apartment for the night so I just bit my tongue. The car ride home was completely silent.

I followed Sean up the stairs and into his apartment and we ended up lying on top of his bed in our nice clothes, staring at the ceiling and not really knowing what to say. I kicked my shoes off after awhile and took my hair down, Sean took off his blazer and kicked his shoes off too and followed it up with a big sigh.

“Are we going to talk about what happened?” I said it a little more angrily than I meant for it to sound.

“What good would that do? It’s pretty clear what the problem is…”

“Is it?” I turned my head to look at him for the first time since we were dancing in the bar.

“Yeah…I’m not good enough and I’ll never be good enough for you.”

I sat up and looked down at Sean.

“I don’t make as much money as you, whenever we go anywhere guys look at us and wonder why you’re with someone like me, and I can’t even please you sexually! When are you going to realize this?”

“Sean, you know that none of that ma-“

“Yeah, you say that now, but what if does start to matter? What happens when you realize that I don’t deserve you? What’s going to happen when you realize that you want to be with some guy who has blonde boy band hair and wears stupid green shirts!?”

I started laughing. Sean rolled over on his side to face the wall, he was fuming. I stopped laughing and looked at Sean quietly for a moment while I contemplated how to help his insecurities about being with me. I got up off the bed, unzipped my dress, and let it fall to the ground before I walked over to the side of the room Sean was facing. He looked at me standing in my underwear and then resolutely continued to stare at the wall angrily. I sat on the edge of the bed and made Sean scoot farther over so that I could lay down with him. I reached behind myself and found his arm, wrapped it around my waist, and snuggled into the pillow we were sharing.

“I would never want to dance with a guy who purposely makes other people feel bad. I don’t like it when men just send drinks over to me, it’s presumptuous and it makes me feel like they just want to get me drunk. I hate boy band hair, it reminds me of the nineties and I really don’t want to relive that. I prefer gray shirts and black blazers over day-glow colors.”

I turned so I was facing Sean; he was trying not to smile.

“But most of all, Sean, I love…being with you.” I was a little disappointed that I couldn’t bring myself to tell Sean the truth about what exactly I loved…but it seemed to be enough for him.

He pulled me closer to him and I kissed him.

“Are you still worried that some loser is going to steal me away from you?” I asked after awhile.

“No…you’re not an object to steal, Faith. I’m worried you’re going to realize I’m not good enough for you some day and I’m not prepared for that day to come.”

“I’m not looking for anyone else, Sean. I want you…you’re just going to have to accept that. The real question is how I got so lucky to have you as my boyfriend.”

“I’m sorry…as your what?” Sean was smiling at me and I started kissing him again.

“As my really hot-“

“Uh-huh.”

“Sexy-“

“Yeah?”

“Talented-“

“Oh, that was a good one.”

“Funny-“

“You’re really good at this.”

“Boyfriend.” I said by the time I reached his t-shirt collar. He scrambled to take off his shirt awkwardly, which made me laugh, and then he pulled my leg around his waist and shifted to be on top of me.

We made it a little farther than we had the last time we tried to have sex, but in the end it didn’t happen for the same reason as last time. He was a lot more upset about it this time, though, probably because of what had happened earlier in the night. I had to build up his confidence again before he finally fell asleep.

New News is Good News

“I’m thinking about getting a pet.” I said.
Anna looked at me with surprise as she handed me a cup of coffee.

“Okay, why exactly?”

“I feel lonely.”

“But you have me and Zoey and Elise.” Anna looked a little hurt.

“I know, but it would be nice to come home to something. I don’t want to be annoyingly needy to my friends by calling them multiple times a night because I’m bored or lonely. Then I won’t have any friends.”

“Faith, listen to yourself. You’re always there for us when we need you. It’s only fair that we be there when you need us, too. I’m sure my miscarriage wasn’t the most convenient for you but you came to the hospital and helped me when Theo left. Let us be there for you.”

“It’s not that I don’t think I can’t rely on you guys, I just want a pet to take care of. They’ll be happy to see me when I come home, I’ll have something to do, like take it for a walk or play with it when I’m bored. I feel like I’ll be more fulfilled if I have something else in my life. For the past few months all I’ve been doing is dealing with Kevin’s crap and working, I just want something for me.”

“Okay.”
Theo walked into the dining room and greeted me.

“Do you ladies need anything?”

“Can you grab the lemon raspberry cookies and then join us?” Anna asked,

“So I’m glad you could come over, Faith. I know I haven’t been the best person to be friends with this year.”

“Anna, you’ve been perfectly fine. I’m just glad I could help you through it. How’s the counseling going?”

“I think it’s going really well. I feel like our marriage is stronger than ever and Theo and I haven’t been so…active …since we were newlyweds,” she said blushing.

“These cookies look and taste amazing,” Theo said setting them on the table and then sitting next to Anna.

They both smiled at me and I suddenly felt nervous.

Anna cleared her throat, “Faith, I-we kind of had an ulterior motive for inviting you over.”

“You mean you didn’t want to just bask in my amazing personality?” I asked trying to lighten the mood.

Anna and Theo giggled, “No, I guess not,” she said, “ We wanted to know if you would be a god mother for us, well, I mean for our baby.”

“WHAT!?”

“Anna found out that she’s pregnant again a few days ago. She’s only a few weeks along and we don’t want to get any hopes up since we could lose it like the last one-“

“But we just couldn’t hold it in anymore and I think you’d make a great god parent to our baby or any future child we might have.” Anna said.

I was speechless with shock and happiness, “Of course! I’d love to!”

Anna jumped up from the table and gave me a hug. Theo left us alone after a few minutes (and after a giant hug from him too) and we started talking.

“We were so surprised, Faith. I thought it would take forever to get pregnant again, like before, but it just happened so fast. I’m going to tell Zoey and Elise tomorrow at work but Theo and I just couldn’t wait to ask you about the god parent thing.”

Anna was absolutely beaming, I’m so happy for her! I told her I couldn’t wait to plan a baby shower and eventually left after much celebrating.
In other news, I’m starting work soon with the news station paper and I have a meeting with the editor in a few days to talk about our work styles and begin the interviewing process.