Monday, July 28, 2014

The Molly-Eyed Monster

I found myself zipping up my jeans in the dark in Mike’s bedroom. He was laying on his bed with his eyes closed. I had come over after that night’s performance with the intention of talking to him about whatever it was that we were doing but we ended up with a repeat of the other night in my apartment. Sarah was gone with friends for the week on a camping trip a few hours away and we had taken advantage of the privacy.

As I slipped my shirt over my head I hesitated saying anything to Mike. He looked so peaceful and I didn’t want to interrupt him, especially because this conversation was going to be unavoidably awkward.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

The Storm Inside

“You don’t have to do that.” I said trying to stop him but he held the front door open for me and stood next to me. I could feel the heat from his body.

“I’m not going to let you go out in this weather. Let’s go.”

I walked into Mike’s hallway and followed him to the elevator. We went to the lower level parking garage and got to his car.

“Wait…is this yours?” I asked.

“Yeah.” Mike said unlocking my car door.

“Is this…”

“Yeah, it’s the one I was working on with my dad. I got rid of my Honda.”

“Wow.” I said taking in the cherry red ’69 Mustang.

I slipped into the passenger seat and buckled up as Mike started it up. I wish I could say that the ride back to my apartment was magical but it wasn’t. It was awkward as hell.


Monday, July 21, 2014

Crash of Storms

Molly and Calvin had gone to see her mother in Michigan for the weekend so I had the apartment completely to myself when I got home from the show on Saturday night. I kicked my shoes off and put my hair up into a sloppy bun before walking into the kitchen in my comfiest outfit (a white crop racer-back crop top and black hipster maxi skirt) to make some popcorn. I turned my stereo on and soft rock pumped through the speakers lightly punctuated by the popping sounds coming from the microwave. I was in a pretty good mood, the show had gone well and the next day was a rare Sunday off due to some theatre maintenance we’ve had scheduled since December. I grabbed a root beer from my fridge and popped the cap off as I stood in front of the sliding glass door to the balcony.

I could see flashes of lightning streak the sky periodically and hear the rolls of thunder course through the city streets around me. It was only a matter of time before the rain started and I smiled to myself. I’ve always loved summer storms. The way they cool everything down, wash everything away. The power they can have. There’s something so much bigger than you when it comes to storms. It makes you forget your problems for just a little bit.

Or maybe that’s just me.

The loud, cranky beeping of the microwave pulled me out of my thoughts. As I filled a bowl with the fresh, hot popcorn my phone rang. I recognized the number immediately and was surprised but hesitated about answering. I chewed my bottom lip, sighed, and picked it up. The only sound I could hear on the other end of the line was intense sobbing.

Thursday, July 17, 2014

A Blog Announcement...Or Two

Hello readers!

There isn't a post today but I do have a blog announcement that has been a long time coming, I think. I'm sure a lot of you think that this announcement has to do with the end of the blog and, in a way, you're right...


Monday, July 14, 2014

Water Under The Bridge

Work the day after the party was…uncomfortable. I knew that pretty much all of the cast and crew had learned about what happened and were going to be watching me closely and that really bothered me but I also recognized there wasn’t much I could do about it. Before the cast and crew arrived, though, Zeke showed up and didn’t immediately brought it up.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Tucker to the Max

We had a belated party for the opening of Tucker’s show tonight and I knew we’d regret hiring him. The show was given a shorter run than the other ones we’ve got planned because of the debacle we’d had at the beginning that led to Tucker being hired in the first place. So, once the show closes (in three weeks) I will have a nice month-long vacation from running shows during the night and will only have to run rehearsals during the day. Sweet! But…back to what happened at the party…

Monday, July 7, 2014

Unspoken to Spoken

After talking with Molly some more I had decided to give Zoey her space and let her come to me when she was ready to talk about what had happened with Penny. It took a few days but she sent me a text asking if she could come over and I agreed.

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Blindside

Penny and I sat at a booth waiting for Molly and Zoey. We went to a familiar little cafĂ© that serves the best brunch in town and I was excited for her to meet my friends. Some of the conversations I’d had with Penny made it sound like she really didn’t have a lot of friends outside of Dan’s old college buddies and some co-workers she was friendly with so I thought introducing her to Molly and Zoey would be a great way to meet some new people.

When Molly showed up she was surprised to see another person but shook Penny’s hand as I introduced them before sitting down and making small talk.  I hadn’t told Molly or Zoey that I was bringing Penny because I didn’t think it would be that big of a deal. Boy, was I wrong…

Monday, June 30, 2014

Box of Worms

Running with Sasha every morning has been an important solace for me. It helps clear my head and gives me the focus I need to get through every day. I haven’t been doing much outside of working and just taking care of myself. I haven’t heard from Adam at all since the weekend he left…until today.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

New Beginnings

Penny and I hung out and it was a lot of fun. We went to see a movie (How to Train Your Dragon 2…because we are adults…ahem) and then grabbed dinner afterwards. I like Penny a lot. She’s honest and genuine and incredibly sincere. Over dinner we talked about things with Adam and how I was feeling about it all and after we talk I always seem to feel so much better.

Monday, June 23, 2014

Mutual

“So, that’s it? You just ended it?” Molly said.

“Faith, what were you thinking?” Zoey asked.

The three of us were at the dog park by my apartment with Sasha and Bear (Wesley’s German Shepherd, who Zoey was taking care of while he was out of town for a photo shoot). I told them that Adam and I were no longer together and they were completely floored.

“I just knew we wouldn’t make it if we tried long distance.”

“Well, that’s not true,” Molly said, “There’s no way you could have really known that unless you actually tried it with him.”

“Seriously.” Zoey said.

I sighed.

“Look, you guys don’t have to make me feel bad, okay? I already feel horrible enough as it is.”

“Have you talked to him since then?” Zoey asked.

Thursday, June 19, 2014

He Is Worth It

Adam and I planned to have a quiet dinner together the night before he was supposed to drive a moving truck to his new apartment in Cincinnati. We had just finished packing up almost everything (his bed would be packed in the morning) and were deciding on what we wanted to eat. I hadn’t been looking forward to this night at all.

We decided to order in pasta from an Italian place about 20 minutes away. When it arrived, I mostly just picked at my penne. We were sitting on the floor with our plates sitting on a box.

“You’re really quiet.” Adam said.

I shrugged.

Monday, June 16, 2014

Choice Words

By the time I arrived at the bar after getting off of work, the party was in full swing. I had steeled myself for this before I left but everything just felt so much more final and real now that I was surrounded by balloons and banners that said things like “good luck” and “bon voyage”. Adam immediately came over to me and kissed my cheek. He pointed me to the food table and was squirrel away by Dan to go talk to some friends he knew across the room.

I stared at the food table and felt sick.

“Faith!” Dan came up behind me and roughly threw his arm around me, “I’m so glad you came! Isn’t this great?”

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Bon Voyage

Things have been weird for the past few days. Since we decided to try doing this long distance, we’ve come to an unspoken understanding not to bring it up. Adam moving is this constant elephant in the room that neither of us wants to address but it’s getting harder to ignore, especially with the moving boxes piling up in his apartment. But, Adam brought something up the other night that made his impending departure too difficult to ignore.

Monday, June 9, 2014

Ohio Bound

Adam and I hadn’t talked since I left his apartment in the middle of the night besides a text he’d sent me the morning after:
    
           I know you need time and I’ll give you some space. –A

I kept going back to reread it periodically since then, I’m not sure why. I found myself on Zoey’s couch with the girls sitting around me.

“I feel like there’s no good solution to this.” I said looking into my cup of tea.

“That’s because there’s not.” Molly said.