Little Help?

It was the weekend and I thought I’d surprise Sean for a change. He had a gig later but I wanted stop by and see if I made a good impression on his friends now that he’d had a chance to be alone with them all and get their unfiltered opinions. I knocked on his door and he answered it confused.

“Hey,” he gave me a kiss as I walked through the door.

“Surprise.” I said grabbing his hand a slowly walking him to his living room.

“You know what?”

“What?” I said pulling him into a hug and kissing along his jaw line.

“I really like surprises.”

“I thought so.” I moved to the other side and started kissing his neck and nibbling on his ear. I’m not sure if Sean noticed or not, but we were slowly edging towards his bedroom door.

“What’s the occasion?”

“I wanted to take you up on your offer the other night, to come home with you. And because I want to interrogate you.”

Sean’s mouth curled into a smile, “Interrogate…that’s…so dirty. Did you bring a whip?”

I gave Sean a suggestive look and backed away from him, “Where would I keep it?” I asked slowly spinning around. I was wearing a black pencil skirt and a tight red knit top with a lace camisole underneath.

I pushed Sean up against the wall right next to his bedroom door and pressed my body onto his. I was holding the collar of his shirt in my two hands playfully. He held his arms up in mock surrender.

“Okay, okay. They loved you. Even Gerry had nice words….and he tends to hate everyone.”

I let go, but didn’t move otherwise, “Really, why?”

“I don’t know, I think he’s just really over-protective of who we let get close to us. He doesn’t want one of us to get attached to a fan or a groupie or something and sacrifice the band…he wasn’t always like this; it gets worse as we become more popular. I mean I know you’re with me for my money but Gerry doesn’t have to know.” Sean was joking now.

“Oh, now you’re gonna get it.” I said smiling.

I pushed off the wall and slowly walked past Sean into his bedroom. I didn’t hear him move to follow me so I took my shirt off and dangled it out of his door; his hands were around my waist pretty fast after that. I turned around and Sean backed me up while I took his shirt off, holding it over his head for a few seconds.

“Oh, come on, that’s not very fair.”

“I told you…you were gonna get it.”

I teased him with short kisses on his lips, down his neck, along his jaw line with his shirt covering his eyes. Finally I took it off and pushed him on to the bed. Sean landed in a sitting position and had his eyebrows raised as I slowly bent down on my knees and started working on his belt buckle and eventually his zipper. When everything had been pulled down I popped back up and gently pushed him so he was lying on the bed. I gave him a really hot kiss that I slowly trailed all the way down to his thighs.

I worked on him for the better part of an hour until I gave up; my knees where on fire and my jaw was getting a little tight, too. There wasn’t even the smallest hint of a response. I was disappointed and fell back on my feet and then my thoughts drifted to Sean. I peeked up over the bed; his hands were covering his face and I felt like a total ass to not realize how…humiliating... this probably was for him.

“Sean,” I slid up to lay next to him, my left arm was slung over his chest, I rested my chin on my hand to look at him.

He didn’t move.

“Sean….hey.” I tried to sound soothing and gentle, his hands remained where they were, trying to cover his embarrassment, “This isn’t-“

“Please stop,” he groaned, “I really don’t want to hear a ‘this happens to everyone’ speech right now, okay?”

“Okay. Will you please look at me, though?” I sat up on my knees at his side, “Sean…” My hands slid gently over his and held them; he slowly took them down, avoiding my eyes. The embarrassment and shame etched across his face was evident.

“I’m going to be late,” he said eyeing the clock. He was really was going to be late.

“Do you want me to come to your show, tonight?” I asked quietly. I had been planning to go see him play tonight to hang out with his friends some more and had surprised Sean by visiting him early to get the dirt on what his friends thought about me before we met up after their set.

Sean was silent.

“I won’t be hurt if you say no. I can understand.”

“No. I don’t want you to come.” Sean’s voice was very dark; his eyes were still fixated on the alarm clock by his bed.

“Do you want me to come by here when you get back?” I knew the answer before I said the words.

“No.”

“Okay, I’m going to go. I’ll call you tomorrow.” I waited for a minute to see if he’d look at me, but he didn’t so I slowly backed up off the bed, grabbed my shoes and shirt and put them on in the living room. I grabbed my purse on the way out his door and didn’t look back.

I debated for awhile if I should ignore Sean and go to his show or wait outside of his apartment building until he got back. I grimaced at the damage that could do and decided to give him his space. I really needed someone to talk to but I’d promised him I wouldn't tell any of my friends about this, so there was no one I could call except Sean and I’m pretty sure he didn’t want to talk about his problem and he definitely didn’t want to talk to me.

Then I had an idea.

“Faith, hey, Anna’s actually in the bathtub right now, is this an emergency?”

“No, Theo…I uh…I actually wanted to talk to you.” I could hear Theo’s confused silence through the phone.

“Okay…..?”

“I’m kind of having a problem…but you can’t tell Anna about this, okay? No one can know we talked about this.”

“Alright, are you in some kind of trouble?”

“No, I’m just having an issue with my boyfriend….and I was wondering if you might have any thoughts on how to…uh…handle it.” I was turning bright red on the phone. Theo and I were friendly but he was not as close to me as Anna was and we were both painfully aware of how…off this started to feel.

“Alright….what is it Faith?”

“My boyfriend can’t….whenever we try to….there’s no response when I….his ship doesn’t have a full sail.” I winced at the terrible euphemism.

The phone was quiet, “Theo?”

“I see. Are you asking me my opinion as a guy or as a medical professional?” Theo cleared his throat; I could see his face turning bright red. Although he’s a doctor, this was just too awkward for both of us.

“A little bit of both.”

“Well as a doctor…something could be seriously wrong with him health-wise.”

“How serious?”

“Well…I’d really have to run the appropriate tests but it could be a sign for a lot of things.”

“Yeah?” I said urging him on.

“Are you sure you want me to list everything off? You panic easy.”

“Give me the list.” I growled through the phone, suddenly irritated at Theo’s caution.

“It could be a sign of high blood pressure, depression, certain blood diseases, some cancers…”

“I see.” My voice was very small, “Anything else?”

“It could all be in his head, too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well…some guys might find the pressure to perform with someone to be too much and so their mind kind of sabotages them without them realizing it.”

“And your opinion as a guy?”

“That’s a pretty embarrassing problem to have, Faith. If it’s in his head….the shame from not being able to perform is only going to get worse, which means his problem is going to get worse. Even if it’s not in his head…he needs to get himself looked at.”

“What should I do?”

“I’m not really sure…as a doctor I would advise that you encourage him to get help. As a guy…the last thing I’d want to do is have Anna bring this up…it would be the last thing I’d want.”

“What should I do the next time this happens? I tried to brush it off and build up his ego, but he wouldn’t even look at me.”

“That’s a tough call Faith. I have no idea. I’ve never…really…had to deal with an issue like this. I’m sure he’ll get over it at some point though. He’ll probably be reluctant to get intimate again.”

“Okay. Thanks for the advice, Theo. And remember, you can’t tell Anna.”

“Scout’s honor.”When Theo hung up I held the phone to my chest for a few seconds before placing it on the receiver.

Poor Sean. What am I going to do?

(Author's note: There will be a post for every day this week. So come back soon and leave lots of comments, I have a feeling you guys are going to like the story's direction.)