Hold The Phone

I took Elise’s advice and called Sean last night with a lot of hesitation. I didn’t really know what to say to him over the phone if he picked up but I felt like I needed to at least try to revisit the connection I’d felt we lost since we started dating.

“Hey.” I said wincing into the phone when I heard his voice.

“Hey… what’s up… is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything is fine; I just thought I’d call you and see how your gigs have been going, if you miss Murphy yet, that kind of thing.”

Sean chuckled into the phone at the Murphy joke, “Yeah well everything is fine. We played a really great crowd in a bigger venue than any other place we’ve played in so that was cool. You know I think you should meet my friends, get to know them a little, I mean I’m with them when I’m not with you mostly…”

“That sounds like fun. How about the night you get back I treat you to pizza with my friends and then we can go see you play and meet your friends afterward?”

“You want me to meet your friends?” I could hear the smile in Sean’s voice and was, surprisingly, annoyed by it.

“Yeah, well they’ve been asking about you and I can only keep them at bay for so long.”

There was an awkward silence, neither one of us wanted to get into the sex thing over the phone. The silence was piercing and making me grimace, I could only imagine what Sean was feeling about it. Eventually he started talking.

“Have you ever….would you be interested in….do you ever have phone sex?” he stuttered, I could see him turning bright red and I suddenly started smiling.

“You know that won’t fix anything, right?”

“Yeah…but if you wanted….we could.” I thought about it and then heard Elise’s voice in my head urging me to try and find the connection I had felt before we started dating….

“I’ve never done it before, but we could try it….how do you…what do you say?”

“I guess you’re supposed to talk dirty and….uh….self-serve…”

We got really into it after a few minutes and when we eventually finished Sean said he missed me and eventually had to go. He should be home in a few more days and I really hope the phone sex made him want to have real sex with me. I’d be lying if I said that having phone sex made the connection strong and alive again, but it helped a little, I just….I feel like it only postponed my slide into complacency with Sean, rather than helped me get out of this funk entirely…I did appreciate his effort to make me happy, though.

“What kind of vibrator do you use?”

“Still no sex huh?” Zoey smirked over the phone.

“No! You could at least pretend to be unhappy with my crappy sex life. Lord knows I am about yours.”

“Gee, thanks. I use a rabbit, by the way, too high-end for you.”

“Zoey, what am I gonna do,” I sighed, “We just had phone sex and it was nice, but the whole time I was kind of pissed that Sean was willing to have sex with me as long as he didn’t have to touch or actually have sex with me.”

“Maybe he’s gay?” Zoey was kidding, but there was a hint of truthful inquiry, “Faith, you have to stop obsessing about this. Either dump him or get over it.”

“I can’t dump him until the weekend.”

“Why?”

“Well, besides the fact that I refuse to dump someone over phone or e-mail, only face to face, you’re meeting him when he gets back this week. We’re having pizza, congratulations. So I’ll have to wait to dump him until after that date….which will be great because I’ll get to be the girl that broke Sean’s heart right after meeting his friends….who we’re also meeting the same night.”

“Count me in. I love free food.”

“ZOEY!”

“Kidding, Faith, kidding. You are seriously sexually frustrated….and this is coming from someone who hasn’t had sex in two years.”

“You’re right, maybe I just need to have an orgasm to get over this.”

“Maybe you do, may I suggest investing in a Rabbit, they’re pretty fantastic.”

“I have a cheap one hiding in my closet somewhere. I’ll be okay.”

After a few more minutes of me moping Zoey let me go so I could “become less frustrated” as she put it. I’m going to see it if it helps.