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Mike didn’t want me to meet his sisters for the first time at Betty’s funeral so he invited me to his parents’ house while they made the funeral arrangements, which was obviously not ideal but nothing about the past few days has been ideal. I wore a dark outfit (dark long-sleeved sweater, dark jeans, boots, and my black peacoat) and prepared myself as Mike and I walked to the front door. We didn’t knock, just walked in.

Frank was sitting on the living room couch with a young woman in her early thirties; they were looking at a book with coffins in it. She had shoulder-length dark brown hair and wore a dark blue dress with small flowers on it. Her eyes were ringed with exhaustion. Frank looked at me and gave me a sad smile before looking back at the book.

“Maggie, this is Faith,” Mike said to her, “Faith, this is my older sister, Maggie.”

I smiled at her and she smiled back, although it was tinged with sadness.

“I’m so sorry.” I said to her.

She nodded and then went back to the book with Frank. Mike walked me into the kitchen where Sarah was sitting at the kitchen island lined with bar stools. Another woman was sitting with her, she had a cup of tea in front of her that she was staring at but she looked up with red, puffy eyes as Mike and I entered.

“Faith, you’ve already met Sarah, but, this is Claire,” He gestured to the other woman, “Claire, this is Faith.”

Claire got up slowly and pulled me in for a hug. She had dark blonde hair like Sarah’s but hers was much longer, it went to the middle of her back. She looked to be in her mid to late twenties and was wearing a pair of skinny jeans and an oversized dark gray sweater.

“I am so sorry.” I said, hugging her back.

Claire sniffled and thanked me.

“It’s so nice to meet you.” She said holding my hands, “I just wish it was under better circumstances.”

I nodded, “Me too. Your mother was a wonderful woman.”

Sarah came and snuggled into my side for a hug, which I obliged.

“I’m sorry, Faith, I’ve barely slept…” Claire said.

“Oh, that’s fine, please, do whatever you need.”

Mike hugged Claire before she headed up to take a nap.

“I’m going to go help my dad and Maggie…” Mike said to me quietly. I was still holding Sarah so I just nodded and patted her hair as he left us in the kitchen.

“Sarah, are you hungry?” I asked pulling away from her to look at her face.

She nodded sadly.

“How does grilled cheese sound?” I asked.

Sarah perked up a bit and I got to work. Within a few minutes we were sharing a grilled cheese at the kitchen island. We ate in silence. What do you say to a 19-year-old girl who’s just lost her mother?

“I…I’m going to major in dance.” She said finally, “I was going to tell her when I got home for Christmas break, I know she would’ve been happy.”

“She would’ve been proud.” I said putting my arm around her.

“Um…I don’t know what I’m supposed to wear.” Sarah said after a few moments.

“Well, usually people wear nice clothes, like the things you’d wear to church, and usually in dark colors. Do you have anything like that?” I asked her.

She shook her head and started to cry. I pulled her to me and rocked her.

“Shhhh. It’s okay. We’ll just go get you something, okay?” I wiped away her tears and she nodded.

Maggie walked in and saw us. She walked to the fridge and pulled out a soda before sighing and picking up the tea cup Claire left behind.

“She never cleans up after herself. And who made this mess in the sink?” She said looking at the pan I used for the grilled cheese.

“I’m sorry, that was me, I’ll make sure to clean it up before we leave. I’ll take care of the cup, too.” I said getting up.

“No. You’re a guest here, I’ll take care of it.” Maggie said waving me away angrily.

I didn’t want to insist on her letting me clean up but it was awkward for me to stand there and watch her fret about dishes so I changed the subject.

“Maggie, Sarah and I were going to go out and get her a dress, would you like us to stop and pick up some groceries or dinner on our way home?”

Maggie shot Sarah a dirty look, “You’re going shopping for clothes at a time like this? Honestly, Sarah, what is wrong with you?”

Sarah looked hurt and mumbled something.

“What? Speak up!”

“The dress is for the funeral.”  I said.

Maggie gave me a cold look and then shrugged nonchalantly, “I’ll make you a list; just let me clean this mess up.”

I nodded and then Sarah and I walked into the living room.

“Dad, maybe we should revisit the idea of cremation. Then we could keep the urn here or put it in her garden out back…”

“Your sister said no to that.”

“But she…hey…” Mike said seeing Sarah and I. He stood up, sensing that I wanted to talk to him.

“Sarah and I wanted to go get her something to wear for the funeral. Can I borrow your car?”

“Yeah, sure.” Mike dug in his pockets for his keys before handing them to me.

“Frank, would you like us to get anything for dinner on our way home?”

Frank asked me to pick up a fried chicken meal from KFC for everyone and said he’d ask Mike to text me how much to buy. I nodded, gave him a hug, and then told Sarah to go get her coat. She ran upstairs just as Maggie came out of the kitchen with the list of groceries.

“This should get us through the holiday. Mom had most of the stuff already bought for Christmas dinner but not everything.”

“Okay,” I said, “I’ll be sure to get all of this. I’m stopping to pick up fried chicken for dinner so, if you’re hungry be sure to let Mike know. He’s going to text me how much to get.”

“Fried chicken?” Maggie asked with disdain, “Let me guess, dad, you asked for that? Are you trying to kill yourself?”

I tried to keep the shock from Maggie’s comment off my face but I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was relieved to see Sarah bounding down the steps, ready to go.

We left and hit a few stores before finding a sensible and age appropriate dress for the funeral.

“We should probably get you some tights so your legs aren’t cold.” I said looking around the mall.

“Okay. Faith….?”

I looked at her.

“Thank you for doing this.”

I nodded, “Of course.”

When we got back to Mike’s parents’ house laden with groceries and fried chicken, I could hear voices from outside the front door.

“That is NOT what she would have wanted Mike! I’ve already explained that I’ll pay for the burial plot!”

“It’s not about the money, Maggie! Mom didn’t leave any kind of instructions for this and you know how much she enjoyed gardening!”

Sarah and I quietly walked into the kitchen as Mike, Maggie, and Frank continued to argue. I put the groceries away with Sarah’s help and made a plate of chicken up for Frank. Sarah sat down at the dining room table with some food.

“Thank you, sweetie.” Frank said as I handed it to him and sat on the arm of the couch.

Mike and Maggie were still fighting, although not as loudly. Claire sleepily walked down the stairs and into the kitchen where I could hear silverware and plates being pulled out of cabinets.

I didn’t want to interrupt Mike and Maggie, so I left his keys on the coffee table where he saw them and then wandered back into the kitchen. I was really uncomfortable, like I was witnessing something that was intensely private. And the argument about what to do with Betty just intensified. Claire eventually joined into the argument but I sent Sarah up to bed before calling a cab.

I motioned to Mike that I was leaving, it was really late, and he came over and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

“I’m sorry you had to see this, today.”

“It’s fine.” I said, “But I should really go, are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

I nodded and then saw my cab from the front window, so I waved to Maggie, Claire, and Frank who all barely noticed me due to the argument they were having over the obituary.

I feel bad for leaving Mike with them but there was really nothing I could do for him. It would have been massively inappropriate for me to try and insert myself into such an argument or try to mediate it. And, really, I don’t think Maggie would have allowed that, anyway.