Box of Worms

Running with Sasha every morning has been an important solace for me. It helps clear my head and gives me the focus I need to get through every day. I haven’t been doing much outside of working and just taking care of myself. I haven’t heard from Adam at all since the weekend he left…until today.

New Beginnings

Penny and I hung out and it was a lot of fun. We went to see a movie (How to Train Your Dragon 2…because we are adults…ahem) and then grabbed dinner afterwards. I like Penny a lot. She’s honest and genuine and incredibly sincere. Over dinner we talked about things with Adam and how I was feeling about it all and after we talk I always seem to feel so much better.

Mutual

“So, that’s it? You just ended it?” Molly said.

“Faith, what were you thinking?” Zoey asked.

The three of us were at the dog park by my apartment with Sasha and Bear (Wesley’s German Shepherd, who Zoey was taking care of while he was out of town for a photo shoot). I told them that Adam and I were no longer together and they were completely floored.

“I just knew we wouldn’t make it if we tried long distance.”

“Well, that’s not true,” Molly said, “There’s no way you could have really known that unless you actually tried it with him.”

“Seriously.” Zoey said.

I sighed.

“Look, you guys don’t have to make me feel bad, okay? I already feel horrible enough as it is.”

“Have you talked to him since then?” Zoey asked.

He Is Worth It

Adam and I planned to have a quiet dinner together the night before he was supposed to drive a moving truck to his new apartment in Cincinnati. We had just finished packing up almost everything (his bed would be packed in the morning) and were deciding on what we wanted to eat. I hadn’t been looking forward to this night at all.

We decided to order in pasta from an Italian place about 20 minutes away. When it arrived, I mostly just picked at my penne. We were sitting on the floor with our plates sitting on a box.

“You’re really quiet.” Adam said.

I shrugged.

Choice Words

By the time I arrived at the bar after getting off of work, the party was in full swing. I had steeled myself for this before I left but everything just felt so much more final and real now that I was surrounded by balloons and banners that said things like “good luck” and “bon voyage”. Adam immediately came over to me and kissed my cheek. He pointed me to the food table and was squirrel away by Dan to go talk to some friends he knew across the room.

I stared at the food table and felt sick.

“Faith!” Dan came up behind me and roughly threw his arm around me, “I’m so glad you came! Isn’t this great?”

Bon Voyage

Things have been weird for the past few days. Since we decided to try doing this long distance, we’ve come to an unspoken understanding not to bring it up. Adam moving is this constant elephant in the room that neither of us wants to address but it’s getting harder to ignore, especially with the moving boxes piling up in his apartment. But, Adam brought something up the other night that made his impending departure too difficult to ignore.

Ohio Bound

Adam and I hadn’t talked since I left his apartment in the middle of the night besides a text he’d sent me the morning after:

    

           I know you need time and I’ll give you some space. –A

I kept going back to reread it periodically since then, I’m not sure why. I found myself on Zoey’s couch with the girls sitting around me.

“I feel like there’s no good solution to this.” I said looking into my cup of tea.

“That’s because there’s not.” Molly said.

The Other Shoe

I walked out of the booth after the night’s performance and smiled.

“Hey, I didn’t expect you to be here.” I said.

But the smile faded away when I saw Adam’s face.

“We, uh, need to talk.” He rubbed the back of his head and looked really upset.

Penny For Your Thoughts

Adam’s interview was today and since I didn’t have to work, I stayed over last night and sent him off this morning with lots of luck. I hung out at his place until he got back because I wanted to hear about how it went. I didn’t realize it was going to be such a long day for him. He didn’t get home until well in the afternoon.