My Rock

“Faith? What are you doing here? I thought you were going to be with Sean until tomorrow.” Zoey had woken me up. I’d fallen asleep on my couch when I got back from the airport at three in the morning.

She’d come to feed Murphy when she found me on the couch.

“Are you okay?” She asked taking in my puffy eyes, tangled hair, smeared make-up, and weary appearance.

I sat up with a lot of effort and looked at my hands.

“Um…” my voice wavered and then the tears started.

“What happened?” Zoey said sitting next to me and laying my head in her lap while I sobbed for what felt like hours.

“I’m going to call Anna.” She said whipping out her phone.

“NO!” I screamed and sat up. “Please, Zoey, I just…I’m so embarrassed, please. I just want you.”

I wrapped my arms around her and then laid my head back down in her lap when she nodded and put her phone down.

“Okay.” She said trying to calm me down, “Just give me a second, okay? I’ve got to make a phone call. NOT to Anna.” She said as my eyes got wide and I started to freak out again. She went into the kitchen and called in sick to work and came back with a glass of water for me. She handed it to me before sitting back down again.

“Faith, tell me what happened.”

So I did.

I told her about Sean crying and his admission. I told her how I had let go of him like his skin had burned me and sat there in stunned silence for about a minute before throwing myself out of bed and gathering my clothes while he tried to explain to me. I don’t remember much of what was said but I wouldn’t let him explain it to me. I told her about how I gathered up all of my stuff and got dressed as he watched and cried and about how I got to the door, turned back around, took my ring off, and dropped it on the dresser the television was sitting on before leaving. He was in shadow but he put his head in his hands and that’s the last image of him I had in my head of the whole thing. I told her about how I got to the lobby as a crying mess and dug through my purse to find the taxi card Tracy had given me earlier. I told her about waiting for the cab and demanding to be taken to the airport and catching the last flight out within minutes.

I told her about landing and just standing in the virtually empty concourse with my suitcase (it was too late to check it for baggage claim) and feeling empty and not wanting to call anyone to come and get me at 2:30 in the morning. A nice man from the airline asked me if he could call me a cab and I nodded. I told her about how I cried the entire time from the airport to my apartment and finally got home, collapsed on the couch, and cried until I fell asleep. And Zoey just listened to me and stroked my hair. She didn’t ask any questions or make any sounds; she just listened until I had nothing left to say. We sat there in silence while Zoey comforted me and I just cried.

“Are you hungry?” She asked me.

“I don’t really know. I can’t tell if I’m hungry or if I feel so violated that I want to vomit.”

“I could order something if you are.”

“I feel humiliated, Zoey. This WHOLE time I’ve been worried about him and allowed him to accuse me of horrible things because I felt bad that he was having such a hard time. I can’t believe he did this to me.”

“Do you know who it was?”

“I didn’t ask any questions or hear a word he said. I have no idea when it happened or with who. I don’t think I want to know. I don’t even know if it was a one night stand or if he’s still seeing her.”

“What are you going to do?” She asked.

“I don’t know. I need time to think about this.”

Zoey didn’t say anything but I had a feeling she wanted to.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing. I just…nothing.” She shook her head.

“Spill it.” I said.

“Well, is there really a lot to think about? He cheated on you and for the past few months he’s been treating you horribly. As soon as Kevin had revealed himself, you ended it. Why is Sean any different?”

Zoey’s words stung and it was hard for me not to get really mad at her.

“Zoey, we were engaged. I’ve been with him for over a year. Kevin lied throughout our whole relationship about being engaged to someone else. I never trusted him and…and I still love Sean. I was planning on marrying him. I think I should at least hear him out when I’m ready to.”

“Okay,” she said sensing my anger and choosing against this battle, “So should I order a pizza?”

It was then that I realized I’d talked for so long that the sun was nearly setting. Zoey was probably starving and I figured I should probably eat something so Zoey ordered a pizza and went to go get it and pick up some ice cream and beers while I took a hot shower and pulled myself together. I hadn’t looked at my phone for nearly 24 hours and I didn’t want to so when Zoey came back with the pizza and beers I gave my phone to her and asked her to take care of it. When she came out of my bedroom she recapped it for me.

“20 missed calls, 7 voicemails, and 6 texts. I listened to the voicemails and then deleted them. I deleted the texts, too. I turned it off.”

“Thank you.” I said with exhaustion before we dug into the pizza.

I don’t know what I’d do without Zoey, sometimes.

(Author's note: I apologize for how late I'm posting this. I started a very intense summer class today and I forgot to post last night after I got all of my class supplies ready and I didn't have access to a computer until now. Again, so sorry! -del)